Among many miracles which were taking place during December one was total ethereal nature of books and environment around me. It was as if I was in a lucid dream unable to control events yet enjoying miraculous nonetheless. The difference with normal lucid dreaming is–they last only a few minutes and allow you to do or witness things which aren’t possible in your waking state–but there I was in a constant stream of lucid dream-like events in my waking state. One of the events was my books which I was reading for exams changed spontaneously with my reactions. I had taken some quizzes one day on synonyms and antonyms and marked answers –once it seemed I forgot to read question well–I reattempted then it seemed choices shuffled on their own and then again it seemed answers shuffled–what was happening I couldn’t fathom though it looked in harmony with all of the events it was so subtle that any attempt to influence it by controlling my reactions was in vain.
In 2009 when things seemed normal I had to clear training assessment tests in order to stay in the IT company I was working in. Since I didn’t devote my time into programming languages exams seemed tough to me and I had never cheated in tests unlike my colleagues so I was in a bigger soup and I flunked in two subjects and I had to take retests for them. I thought it was because I was a fool to not to cheat that I flunked so decided to do as everyone did–I was sitting on the bench which was second from the front and there was a girl in the seat ahead of me who was my batch-mate.I didn’t know anyone was watching so as soon as invigilator went to the backside I asked her to tell me the answer to a question–as soon as i did this i felt someone touching my back–he asked me to move out of the exam room–he was the second invigilator sitting in the back–silently watching over us-Agh! Everyone could get away with cheating and now I was going to flunk the exam for the first time I tried to cheat to save my job. Everyone in the batch used to cheat because basically we studied using answers of questions(called dumps) which were repeated–nobody was intelligent enough to clear the tests of this multinational organization on their own because their benchmark for freshers was too high–it was like our education system had been all my life.I got up and didn’t know what to do–at the same moment this invigilator got a call from someone and left the hall telling the second invigilator to see me out of the hall. I pleaded him to let me stay and attempt. The second guy was gentle and allowed me on the condition that i was on my own and supposed to finish off before the prime came again. I had my heart rushing and I quickly started attempting all questions–within 5 minutes I finished questions which take 90 minutes to answer and yet I scored well above the passing marks. I had flunked the last time when I sat whole time and attempted them honestly and this time around I passed! What was going on? It was a miracle for me and also for my batch-mates.
In 2013 I was living in Vrindavana after having run away from home and a government job which I was supposed to join. The day before joining it I ran away–on 12th of September 2013. I reached Vrindavana on 13th and with many Deja Vus started living in an ashrama and served as a priest. I had a tough routine which I embraced with love for newfound freedom from old and mundane. Andromedans had informed a special person about earth’s entrance into the fifth dimension on Dec 3, 2013. I received a great intuition at the same time to restart my esoteric communion with LOGOS. I had given up listening to WORD albeit occasionally since great dark night of soul in 2012 and here in Vrindavana Ii used to worship ritually and devotional songs along with regular mantra chanting and service were in my routine. One day as I took bath and started wearing my clothes i had a feeling that there was a lizard on my spine–I became terrified and immediately started to remove my clothes one by one. I found no trace of any lizard. Then as i was sitting besides the pond with books waiting for Satasanga with a fellow devotee as was my usual routine I again felt that there was a lizard up my spine I tried to catch it with hand but couldn’t and a deep fear took over me as I was uncovering my clothes and couldn’t find any lizard.
Moreover as I used to sleep in the light–as soon as I switched lights off I used to hear sounds like mouse biting something. Sometimes it was mouse but at other times I used to see nothing and it irritated me greatly as after 15-17 hours of work I needed 3-4 hours of sleep to wake up again very early in the morning.
Only in the aftermath(2015 onward) could I decipher what those events meant. I had forgotten all about Kundalini awakening and it was the energy which was taking various shapes to disturb me and shock me. Snakes also terrified me for a while which was not a matter of concern for most residents over there. I decided to read more books and found Prasanga Paarijaat and Guru Nanak’s biography by Jayram Mishra among many other books in the ashrama. I also wanted to create a beautiful library in the ashrama. As i started listening to word again I observed many changes as my spirit started exerting freedom again. I observed many discrepancies in my surroundings and wanted solitude.
Sage Ramananda was a mid age saint who is considered to be Guru of Kabir and Ravidas along with ten other great sages. He opened his doors and gave keys to sacred divine knowledge of WORD in form of Surati-Shabd-Yoga to all irrespective of their caste, creed, gender, social or ethnic orientation. Some sacred passages from his life were collected in the book written by his disciple Chetandas and kept secret as termas for 700 years until India got independence as termas. The book is still very little known and for me seemed like Tibetan Book of The Dead–a savior in itself which could liberate upon intellectual understanding. Gandhi was an incarnation of sage Kabir and Kabir was an incarnation of Prahalada which was prophesied in the book some 600 years before Gandhi’s birth . The predictions might have interfered with Gandhi’s mission therefore they were kept secret. I was fortunate to read it and following few passages stood out for me:
Once a sincere seeker went to learn secret of all knowledge and Vedas to the sage. The sage said “Inner soul is like Shiva and keeps chanting name of Rama(Paramatma/God) –this sound keeps echoing in the temple of heart. The priest of heart temple listens these sounds with an introverted solitude mind and listening them becomes a Yogi–yogayukta–yoked with God. Yogayukta man without any attempt becomes a candidate for six fold virtues( of full knowledge, fame, detachment, Dharma, Glory, Blessings). And six enemies of desire, passions, greed etc are immediately subdued. As soon as he becomes a candidate for these virtues he observes a twinkling light starts shimmering in those melodious sounds. After gradual practice that light gets crystalline and becomes a light which engrosses all mental powers like a flame attracts and burns all moths. Then Shiv(soul) merges into Vishnu(Rama) and Rama merges into the absolute. “
“Sarga(creation/heaven) isn’t what happens at the beginning of the creation as depicted in scriptures but something which starts as soon as you realize yourself in all beings”–when unity consciousness dawns it’s a new universe created. Similarly dissolution is not as depicted in the scriptures–it’s a great transition for new creation as you awaken into another dimension.
Once a seeker who had doubts about master and God consciousness went to the sage. As soon as he reached out to the hut of the sage and touched his feet the scene changed and he saw Krishna playing flute as various damsels were dancing around him. Then the scene again changed in a few moments and he saw lord Rama with his brother laxmana and wife Seeta in his divine abode seated on his throne. Then scene again changed and he saw Rama alone sitting on a throne smiling. In all these scenes he observed that the faces of Krishna and Rama looked exactly like sage Ramanada’s . Then he saw sage sitting on the throne instead of Rama with a bow and then the scene changed to bring seeker back to the hut. Thus the seeker realized that there was no duality whatsoever and masters are same as Gods.
When I was undergoing miraculous transformations i witnessed what we may call Krishna-consciousness, Rama-consciousness and World-form of Krishna as depicted in Bhagwad Geeta–the song of Krishna. It’s because i had been a devotee of Krishna for sometime. The beatitude can’t be expressed in words and all the details can’t be summed up in the accounts of these blogs still I try to capture a few memories.
Once my father sent me along with my brother to worship Saturn-lord of Karma by offering lamps of oil to an old Saturn temple. We went and did offer lamps and I had an inkling to visit old temples of Rama I had seen in my childhood in that colony where my grandmother used to live before. As I was going towards the temple i witnessed a familiar boy worshiping goddess Durga in a temple beside and many people were attending the evening ritual aarti procession so I also participated without saying anything to the boy. He was two years younger to me and came to meet me two months ago when I had broken into Reality and used to take Bhaang(Marijuana’s cheap form) everyday. He asked me to help him with a decision. Should he go and leave his family and live like a renunciate or live like a householder–his heart wasn’t in the mundane and materialistic and he wanted to do social service especially by uplifting the temple premises and organizing a committee to help poor people. I told him what was the absolute Truth and in those days I used to give nothing but absolute Truth so that people awaken to realize that all problems were like problems in dream. I realized that as I told him about the void I also said that there might come a day when you get this wish fulfilled and I will be there with you as you get due respect for your endeavors because we are in the zero point and writing scripts here and now.
The day I saw him in the temple my psyche had undergone a great change. During our discussion I was convinced that lord Shiva was manifest in his form to teach me by asking me some questions and I told him the story in which sage Bhrigu had tested greatness of Bramha, Vishnu and Mahesh aspects of Hindu trinity of Cosmic man. I also told him that the same story I had narrated as a very young boy to his elder brothers who had joked then. It was a lesson in humility as sage Bhrigu finds Vishnu the preserver to be the most humble of all and calls him the greatest among three. By the time I met him in the temple of Rama I had forgotten all about our meetings as no memories were being retained by my living-in-the-moment VOID mind anymore. I had a great deja vu and the devotional love for sage Ramananda whose words like Nisargadatta’s used to come to save me every now and then. I heard him singing a song in which he said Krishna became Rama and so on..i observed great care with which flowered were adorned before trinity of Rama, Laxmana and Sita and I also felt my home-coming to the divine abode. I realized he was singing songs to himself–worshiping himself and in me the consciousness had divided itself into two God and the devotee. Master and disciple. Though all had been happening in me–at that moment I observed how Ramananda was clearly manifest in boy. I saw profuse river of tears from my eyes as I witnessed myself praying for forgiveness for my sins and gratefulness which had brought him to teach me and bring me on to the path of light. I saw many elderly ladies singing too and then as he went inside those ladies surrounded him to get grace and I felt what I had uttered came to be true like many other things before–the strong deja vus suggested cyclic nature of universe that it had happened before and yet it was being repeated because I was on a critical divine juncture entering into a new realm. I had seen great darkness and now I was witnessing great light. He recognized me now and called me in to take his throne. He said “I didn’t sit on throne because of you!” Aha! those words touched me on so many levels–Ramananda in form of Rama didn’t sit on throne because my devotional love wanted him to behave like a renunciate–it melted me like anything and he wanted me to sit on the throne because i needed respect–I was in divine rapture. all three of us sat on surface and I didn’t have much to say as I had witnessed great miracles and met sage Ramananda and lord Rama face to face.